Thinking About Stuff.

I rarely have time to actually have fun with my life nowadays. So for every opportunity I get to spend some time alone, I take it without any hesitations.

Here I go again blogging. It has really become a habit of mine to post an entry almost everyday. Clearly, this is no longer a hobby for me. It is not a "want" anymore. I have already considered blogging as a necessity in my life. To blog is to live. That's what I think about my Blogger now. As much as possible, I don't want to miss a day without blogging. As often as I can, I'd like my life to go on the record. Why? Well, in a way, I guess...I want to look back and say, "Hey, I actually had a life," and have a smile on my face by the end of the day.

Speaking of living, let me share with you a quote that was sent to me by one of my college kabarkada...

"First I was dying to finish high school and start college. And then I was dying to finish college to start working. And then I was dying to marry and have children. And then I was dying for my children to grow old enough for school so I could return to work. And then I was dying to retire. And now I'm dying...suddenly I realize I forgot to live."

Wasn't that a very fitting quote?

I said it before. Nowadays, I feel so restless. I feel so tired. I feel as if nothing is really making sense anymore. Am I thinking of committing suicide or something? Not even close. It barely even crossed my mind. The mere thought of leaving this world with so many unfinished businesses, it scares me so much.

Maybe that's the reason why I live. I have so many dreams to fulfill, so many goals to achieve. I want them all to come true. I want to prove to myself, of all people, that I have what it takes to show I am a person who is capable of doing anything at her best.

I ate dinner with my best friend and her sister last week. While going back to their condo, Claudia told me that she couldn't imagine me being in PolSci. "Si Kristina pwede pa kasi she's always debating and stuff," she said. This was quite a surprise.

Hmm...wait. I take it back. It's no longer a surprise for me. A lot of people thought that I'd be taking up Journalism or Mass Communication or Communication Arts. Little do they know that I had a thing for Social Sciences. I did the unexpected and took up Political Science. It's not that I have any regrets. Absolutely no regrets, that's for sure! I just wish people would stop thinking that I'd be better off with Journalism than Political Science. Despite all the hardships I've gone through and going through, I love my life in college. Truth, the whole truth and nothing else but.

Writing thesis.
Studying reports.
Researching term papers.
Getting the hang of being Editor-in-Chief.

That's basically how I'm living my life right now. Am I worried I would fail? No doubt about it. However, in more ways than one, I know I can do it.